• Tahlia Asinate

Raise Your Standards

Raise your standards.

That’s the advice I received as I asked my boyfriend what I could do to remain happy and fulfilled on a more consistent basis.

As I continued to complain, he stopped me and said —

Look, it doesn’t matter how many excuses you make, at the end of the day everything in your life is your responsibility. No matter the cards that you are dealt, it’s up to you whether you allow yourself to be a victim or a victor. Ultimately though it’s the victors that make the most out of life and consistently attract that which they desire.

However, if you want to be a victor, you have to let go of your excuses. You have to raise your standards, and you have to stick to them. You also have to show up each and every day to keep moving forward because that’s what’s required to create a happy and fulfilling life experience.

And while for a split second I didn’t want to agree with him, I knew he was right. Regardless of the situation that I was in if I wanted things to change, it was up to me to make it happen. So, that’s what I did, I took some time to self-reflect and outline the standards that I needed to incorporate to become the type of person that I wanted to be.

Now, what those standards look like is individual to my situation and ideals. However, each of us has standards that we live up to each and every day. Whether those standards serve us or not, well that’s a different story. Also, the interesting thing about our standards, is that we will do everything in our power to maintain them. This is evident in our life experience and our identity, both of which are the result of the standards that we keep.

Thus, in situations where we're trying to evolve or make a positive lifestyle change, part of why it feels uncomfortable doing such things is that we’re trying to adhere to different standards than what we are used to. Meaning, that if we want to achieve something specific or improve in any way, we must make it an irrefutable standard.

Our standards are what define us. We are not the highest version of ourselves which we can imagine. We are the lowest version of ourselves which we can accept. — Sam Ovens

Something also important to remember is that life is such a way that if you’re not moving forwards, you’re moving backwards. While it might not appear so at first, time reveals all and each of us will wake up one day wondering how time flew by so quickly. Hopefully though in those moments of self-reflection we will be able to look back and have something positive to reflect on. Making it in our best interest to set high standards and to live up to them.

Ultimately, the choice is ours, and it’s up to us to invest our time and energy wisely. Yet, by having high standards and by engaging in things that help us evolve and grow, we will find ourselves more fulfilled than if we did the opposite because as in the wise words of Tony Robbins …

Progress equals happiness.

Although at first, it might be difficult, and while at times it may feel uncomfortable — setting higher standards and sticking to them no matter what is what will lead to the most progress.

At the end of the day, the choice is ours … We can either live with low standards and inevitably move backwards. Otherwise, we can set and rise to meet standards that will help us evolve, progress and experience happiness and fulfilment. The choice is yours, so choose wisely and remember that you are where you are because of your standards.


Tahlia X

Now, I'd like to hear from you! What are some standards you like to keep? Let me know in the comments below.